Love on the road Part 2

i stood in front of his house, and ranged the doorbell.
the door inmidiatly opened by Richard, and i felled sorry for him and i said " God, you look terrible what happend to you ? "
" She dumped me, she thinkes that i cheated on her..." he said and he started crying again.
I felt a lump in my throat, how would I not want to kiss him and tell him how much I love him and that he does not need her, because I always will love him.
i just stood there and i looked at him, and i saw the pain in his eyes, i couldn't resist it anymore and i hugged him and said " Everything is gonna be okay, you don't need her, look what she has done to you..."
Richard smiled, he knew i was right, but i just loved the girl, he had changed because of her, i already thought that wasn't good idea, but he did it. i thought he was perfect like the way he was.
i said "You understand now, that you are perfect like the way you are ? "
Richard smiled again and nodded and said "yeah, you're right, sorry that i didn't listen to you.."
"don't worry, we always will be friends forever, no matter what happends..." i said.
We decided to watch an movie, cause he won't think about her.
after a while he asked "you are staying over tonight ? "
i looked at him and said "you want me to stay over ? "
He looked at me and nodded, and said " you are everything that i need now..."
i smiled and said "okay, if you want me to stay, then i will stay.."
Later on the evening we went to bed, i pulled on my night suit, while he was watching me.
it made me feel a bit shy, cause he looked on a other way then he did before..
i've been staying over at his place many times, and he always saw me undressing myself and putting some night suit on, but then he didn't looked at that way as he was looking at me now.
i smiled at him and layed down in his bed and waited for him to come laid next to me.
When he layed next to me, he layed his arm around me and wished me goodnight.
i wished him goodnight to and went to sleep.

Next morning i woke up noticing that Richard already got out of bed, i heard the shower running and i waited for him to come out, so i could take an shower to.
Then suddenly the door opened and he walked naked through the room, i laughed and said "Put something on please!"
He just had to laugh to me and said "you like it, i can see it on your face, don't lie to me.."
i had to laugh even more and i said "you wish!!" but inside my body, my heart was pounding like crazy... GOD he looked damn good!
worst thing is... It's ages ago that i've had sex...
i expected that he was putting some clothes on but he came laid down on bed next to me,
and i asked dry "what are ya doing ? don't you have to dress yourself ? "
"God, was i really saying this ? STUPID ME" i thought.
Richard thought it was quiet funny cause he knew, i tried to resist him, he layed on the top of me and tried to kiss me.
But i turned my head and said " Richard what are you doing ? "
"kissing you" he said.
but i stopped him and said " Richard it's only been a day between you and ..."
but he layed his finger on my lips and said " i know, but i changed my mind, because i realised something this morning..."
"what ? " i said.
"I realised, that the person i love most, had always been close to me, but i didn't saw it.., and that person is you, and when i woke up this morning i realised how happy i was when you layed next to me..." Richard said.
"i..i...i don't know what to say.." i said.
" Say you love me.." He said.
i couldn't resist him any longer now, and i kissed him to let him know that i loved him.

That day, we made love all day together.
but it wasn't ment to be, i guess...

1 year later...

my phone goes when i'm in the studio after finishing shattered pieces, i heard Myron talking and crying on the other side of the phone...
and my phone falls to the ground and i'm crying, i feel the hot tears burning on my cheeks.
Why ? was i questening myself.
Why did he had to die in an fight, they stabbed him and runned away, when they found him it was already to late...
i drowned myself in misery and started writing sad lyrics.
i lost the lust to live and to rock. i grabbed a beer out of the fridge and started drinking, and i mean a lot.
when the doorbell goes off, i do not bother to open the door.
i didn't wanted company in any kind... i just wanted to be alone...

many times i tried to kill myself, why had this to be in this way ?? it makes me feel sick and lonely...
and i run to the bathroom and throw up in the sink. and i stared at myself in the mirror.
i just didn't knew what to do, suddenly i felt an hand on my shoulder and i looked at Lenn and i sank down on my knees and started crying again.
she hugged me and didn't knew what to say, but she said after a while "i will always be here for you.."
and i said " why does he had to die ?, first my parents and then him... it's just like God don't want me to be happy..."
and i sobbed in Lenn her arms, she called the other girls and said they had to come, to help me.
they didn't left me for an second, they standed by me and helped me with my sorrow.
slowly i started to accept, that he wasn't coming back anymore...
still i had my hard days, but the girls and me decided to buy an appartment together cause we made an promise and that promise is.. "we are sisters forever, through bad times and through good, we remember our dear beloved once but let them live with heavy metal!"
i smiled when me and the girls made that promise, i started to reveal some things and i totally concetrated on my music.
it make me work on it day and night, and when i was tired i got to sleep.

6 months later...

i was in the studio working on the lyric, it was early in the morning but i didn't mind, it was a hard day for me, cause i had to think about Richard, but i kept my promise to the girls and made heavy metal for him.
when the girls came in the studio, they noticed that i was already there, and they smiled, they knew i kept my promise to them, and that was good. they were happy to see that, and it was the way Richard wanted her to be.
i knew that to, and i told the girls what i made up for the new album...

another 6 months later...

when the girls and i were doing the repetition our manager came inside and said " News for you girls!
The Rasmus, wanted an new and good band for in their program, and they ask the band if you want to join them!
We all laughed and said "Are you serious Thomas!"
"wow that's so awesome! Let's do it!" i said.
and the girls nodded with me, we accepted the inventation to tour with The Rasmus.
Thomas nodded happily and said "knew you girls would like it, well the tour is starting about 1 month on first of July! that's one day after releasing your new album!
We sighed and noticed we had to work hard to catch up to the deadline, but we knew we would make it!